Daily Prophet

Daily Prophet                                                                                             
14-11-2011

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News

Cover-ups

The Wizarding world, as we know it was almost exposed in recent events, as Wizard, and ex-death eater Augustus Rookwood worked hand in hand with muggles to create what they call a 'video-game'. The game - which will remain unnamed came out less than a week ago- on 11-11-11. This game, played on something called a 'wii' used muggle technology to simulate movements and training that wizards and witches go through at Hogwarts- While most muggles thought it was just a game, and pure fiction a few believed what they were doing was real- almost exposing Wizardry to the world.

The Magical Law Enforcement Squad was sent to America where the game originated, and the memories of the creators, and all those who played a the game have been modified. Making what is to this day one of the largest cover-ups in modern Wizarding history. Rookwood was working with the muggles to unmask the Wizarding world in a misguided attempt to get revenge for his fallen master, He-who-must-not-be-named.


"Rookwood is scheduled to be sent away for good  to Azkaban  next week. The Minister for Magic had no comment, but it is the believed of The Prophet that he's attempting to set a standard of no tolerance when it comes to the safety of the Wizarding world."

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Sports


Quidditch-
Gryffindor versus Hufflepuff

This years Gryffindor vs Hufflepuff match has ended in disaster when both seekers crashed headlong into Mr Lockhart. None of those present were hurt and Hufflepuff managed to secure themselves a win putting them in the running to win the Quidditch cup, however Mr Lockhart has decided to press charges at the ministry of magic for letting younger wizards play the sport.

'Ever since Harry Potter became the youngest seeker in over a hundred years many first years have taken to playing the sport: Mr Harry Potter should have been a one off due to his supreme talent. Allowing young wizards who can barely sit a broom to take part in this sport is irresponsible.' says Mr Lockhart
'I think Mr Lockhart might have had too much butterbeer: he was hanging from the spectator stands,' says Lily Luna Potter who witnessed the event. 'I don't think the players were to fault.'
Mr Lockhart is yet to reply to this allegation.

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Entertainment


Start of the Season

Halloween is over, and already shops in Diagon Alley and Hogsmeade are setting up for the Christmas season! Shops all over sport Christmas trees and wreaths of holly in their windows. Madam Rosmerta, the owner of the Three Broomsticks, says that she much enjoys the holiday season, “Christmas brings snow, and snow brings customers wanting Butterbeer. Sales nearly triple during Christmas!”  
Also, students at Hogwarts are buzzing with excitement. Many are already thinking about what they’re going to do, and where they’re going to go over the holiday. A Gryffindor student, Rose Weasley, says, “Our family and the Potters are going to visit my uncle Charlie in Romania. Dad says we will be able to see dragons there. My brother and I can’t wait!”
The professors are also preparing. The classrooms and the great hall are already showing signs of Christmas. Another student, Scorpius Malfoy, exclaims, “I don’t know what all of this fuss is about. It’s barely November, not even near Christmas time.” Well, some people are need some Holiday spirit!

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The Death Omens that Aren't Real!
(or at least one)

So I’m pretty sure that many of you have heard the very common superstitions running about. Whether you believe them or not is another problem entirely. So either you avoid black Kneazles altogether (which I heard they take great offense to) or any giant shaggy dog sends you into transports of hysteria. But if you are a rational person such as me, you take all these superstitions with a grain of salt (or you throw it over your shoulder).

Anyway, just as I promised I bring you a bit of insight on the Augurey, a quite misunderstood and feared bird that is shunned because many believe it’s cry foretells death. This creature is native to Britain and Ireland, but it has been spotted in Denmark and even a few times in Sweden, where I have heard it was greeted with much less enthusiasm. Or any reaction in general. But when you live somewhere that cold you are more probable to be sacred of different things, namely Yetis (or is it Yetii?).

This bird which is quite thin and mournful looking, builds tear-shaped nests out of thorns and brambles (see the pattern yet? I do). After much research it has been ascertained that their cry does not in fact foretell death, but merely rain. They eat fairies (good-riddance), insects, and flies (but aren’t flies insects too?) and hunt in heavy rain (I think there was a connection there somewhere). But for some unfathomable reason, their feathers repel ink, which has made it exceedingly difficult for me to write this, but I have persevered with the help of chocolate and an enchanted typewriter. So long, and thanks for all the phish! or was it tisch.......?

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